September 23, 2007

"Off with his head!" he said.

Dear 24-7-on-the-warpath VHP,

The news, nowadays, really is a delight to read. So much entertainment. So much masala. Wild quotes fly around, threats are made, people rush in and out of jail. But I have to hand it to you, you take the cake. What you will hate, of course, is the fact that you share your limelight with Karunanidhi, CM of TN. And, to be frank, I personally prefer him to you, just a wee bit more.

After all, this 83-year-old atheist is still young and happening. I don't know why, but I feel he's getting an almost vicious, sadistic pleasure out of spouting quotes like "Rama was a drunkard." And somehow that's hilarious and endearing. It's the sort of thing I would feel like doing, just to see the reaction. I mean, imagine throwing the nation into tumult with one sentence, which is nothing more than an opinion. Brilliant.

And things go as expected. Some loony from your side is offering an equal weight in gold if someone can behead Karunanidhi. Come on. The man's 83. Cut him some slack. Not because he's old, but because all he has done is state an opinion and question mythology. Anyway, if you believe in your God so dearly, why does Karunanidhi's opinion make such a difference to you?

And then, the VHP itself has no great place in India. I mean, okay, you have a few rabid Hindu fundamentalist supporters. So what? The media pretty much hates you, the political parties are scared of being associated with you. Even the BJP, which began its journey with you as a companion, now hedges and mouths platitudes about secularism when questioned about their connection to you. Face it, you're in a pretty sad position. And coming up with "Off with his head!" type of dialogues made even the Queen of Hearts a pretty unpopular character in the 19th century (or whenever Alice in Wonderland was set) so I don't see it benefitting you greatly in this day and age.

Finally, Karunanidhi is such a dude. I mean, those black glares, the nonchalance, the atheism, the stubbornness, the sarcasm. Do you really think he'll give a damn what you think of him or what you want to do to him? This is a man who survived a midnight rough-up by Jayalalitha's men quite suavely a few years ago. Proof enough of resilience.

Plus, southern states. Now this may sound like I'm stereotyping, but they do have a larger-than-life image of every icon. Be it Rajkumar (of "Tic tic tic" fame) or Rajnikanth, no one can beat the southern states for pure idol worship. A bit of that extends to their politicians as well. To many, Jaya didi can do no wrong. The same rule applies to Karunanidhi. And admit it or not, public adulation for a person will always be more than that for an organisation. So you kinda start on a weak footing in that department, you know. And if you think he will lose the next election because of this, dream on. He may lose the next election, but that'll probably be because of anti-incumbency, or negative policies, or something that affects the people more than whether Rama drank liquor or not.

Be broad-minded. You wanna fight over the "Ram janmabhoomi," go ahead. You wanna propagate silly ideas of a Hindu nation, your wish. But don't yell blue murder when someone else decides to make statements that are equally controversial, and don't threaten homicide when someone questions your God's existence. Believe and let believe.

Wishing you a healthier, happier, less violent tomorrow,
The author of this blog.

PS: Remember the Sethusamudram project? That's where this started. Just thought I'd remind you. Not that it would matter to you, considering you've attempted to understand science just as much as I've attempted to understand the bloody blinking yellow and orange lights on my printer. But hey, I think the coral reefs out there are a bigger reason to save it than it being the "Ramsetu". There, I said it. So, now what? Off with my head also?


Unrelated to this, but, "I want to thank you back home Pakistan and where the Muslim lives all over the world."?! Excuse me?! Since when did "Muslims all over the world" and "Pak supporters" become synonymous?


Asterix said...

VHP plays an important role in the Indian society. That of the violent village idiot. Someone whom everyone shies from, and is scared of. If it were not because of VHP, life in India would have been a lot more boring. They are the spice in "Incredible!ndia" (sic).

Btw, those BB yellow and BB orange lights on your printer denote "stand by" and "receiving data" modes :)

Pratz said...

Hmm...first of all gr8 name for the blog..I liked the sub-title...really defines ur way of writing...
Good point of view...something which is shared by a majority of young Indians...Sooner or later they will get over with it..with one side conceding to the other's demand....and we will have some new masala to read abt..So what would be next I wonder...hmmm!!!
P.S.: Mudra...u should consider serious journalism..why CA??(Though I knw u can tackle both very well!!)

Neha said...

happy one year anniversary :)

and ya pretty funny post there even though i care neither for the VHP or man with the funniest goggles (thats right they can't be called sunglasses) and the silly issue that has cropped up out of almost nothing.

anyway i am sure to read some more of your stuff now!

Vandana said...

Hiya Mudra.. Good one :-) Reading your blog after a long time..
To tell you the truth I think we Indians as a group.. tend to be over sentimental.. and touchy about things.. The good thing of course is that public also has a very short memory.. so till the next issue comes along we have to keep hearing all this crap.. and then lo.. we'll go back to the newest ash and abhishek news.. :-)
Keep writing.. and happy anniversary!

Pratz said...

p.s. liked the recommendations and quotes blocks u added to the blog...!!