August 09, 2010

Bad movies are useful when there's nothing to blog about

There are only two reasons you should watch Aisha. One is Amrita Puri, much easier to fall in love with than Sonam Kapoor. The other is that Abhay Deol gets to wear the nicest clothes that any film producer ever gave him, and looks absolutely wonderful.

If you want anything other than these 2 things (a movie, for example) then you will be disappointed. Because Aisha isn't a movie. Aisha is the story of how two rich girls decided that the easiest way to expand their wardrobe (and get money to do it) would be to make a movie and put down all the clothes as costs to the film.

So the film is essentially about shopping (which Sonam Kapoor does all the time) or window-shopping (which you are forced to do all the time, because there is no point in time at which anyone -except Abhay Deol- is normally dressed.)

People get hooked and unhooked to others with alarming speed and by the end of the movie, it almost seems like everyone fancied everyone at some point. I'm sure this isn't true, but at the end of the movie no one really wants to figure out.

Sonam Kapoor seems to have taken over the blonde territory (every movie so far!) at a time when most female actors are trying to find meaningful, woman-of-substance roles. Even the blondeness would be okay if it wasn't so... er... bratty. Or, well, retarded.

The film is also about, well, Sonam Kapoor. Sonam Kapoor eating (diet food), shopping (for designer stuff), talking (mostly bullshit), trying to be cute (ending up looking retarded), gardening (with pearls in her hair), sleeping (with makeup on), fighting with Abhay Deol (and losing pretty badly, because she's dumb and he's hot) and generally making you wish that she would go away and let Ira Dubey, Amrita Puri and Abhay Deol do something useful with a film that seems to be going nowhere, forever.

Many polo matches, shopping trips, blonde women and annoying men later, the movie ends and you can't help being thankful.

I don't know whether the movie is supposed to make you like/identify with Aisha, but if it does, it's probably a case of epic failure.

If it's supposed to give you some kind of exclusive window-shopping experience, it fails rather badly too, because a lot of it looks like the kind of thing that would make even a decent-looking person look fugly.

If it was supposed to show you how the rich/famous of Delhi live, then I'm sorry, but does anyone really care?

If it was supposed to be India's first chick flick, let's face it, we'd rather stick to watching Bridget Jones again. Because Bridget is fat, funny, interesting, has a crazy mom and genuine problems that we can identify with. (FYI, just because your movie is about clothes, it's not a chick flick. Especially if the girls in the audience find the lead actress a complete annoyance.)



Keetarp Aidonak said...

I disagree. Abhay has made a bad choice.
He does everything in Aisha that he did not do in Dev D and Lucky, such as dance, punch, and serenade a girl as a chocolate boy. He drank, got punched and flirted like a brat. And he rocked at it. He did not rock in Aisha.

Asterix said...

Sonam Kapoor is a waste of space, much like her annoying dad. I didn't like her other Delhi movie too -- Delhi-6.

Haven't seen the movie, and now never will. Thanks for the warning.

PS: Blog more!
PPS: Even I love Bridget Jones Diary :) (only the first one though)

Suchita said...

haha! awesome! "Bad movies are useful when there's nothing to blog about"- so true! i did precisely the same thing!
but honestly, i quite liked the outfits in d movie... wishful thinking but i'd like to be able to wear 'em on d streets of mumbai some day without being stared at like i jus catwalked off the ramp... :P

Avantika A. said...

Hear hear! I gave the whole its-not-a-chick-flick gyan too, to an MCP who told me "oh women will like it"! And he was wondering why i was so offended!

Life Unleashed said...

well quite true...the movie is complete shopping material n dat too not up to da mark...a blemish on Emma...n esp sonam kapoor..she somehow always manages to make a film complete nuisance...

Spaz Kumari said...

but..but..dior is a sponsor! and so much manish arora! such a pretty, such a pretty...sigh.

Aside from all that, one tiny little defense for aisha is that emma - who is supposed to have inspired her character and this movie - was also characterised as a well-meaning, shallow and annoying matchmaker in the book by the same name.

but i didn't like emma very much either, so i am happy to dislike aisha as well :P

jhayu said...

I have just one thing to say. Does no one think the image in the top right of that poster makes it look like Sonam's riding some guy reverse-cowgirl? No? Just me, then.

Abhishek said...

Haven't watched it so can't comment about the movie. And about Sonam Kapoor....well her PR skills are good for sure!

Nice post.

Anonymous said...

totally agree with you.
i got more and more pissed as the movie dragged on, but totally lost it when she wore lesbian Diane keaton outfits and a LBD to a hospital.
i call it the movie that gave me malaria.

I said...

I would have much rather read *this* than anything else that called itself a review of Aisha. Your blog's superb, and I'm coming back for more!

Saro said...